Friday, December 26, 2008
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Funny postings??
With the current financial situation here..I can't think of any thing funny......This is not funny but I would be very happy when the COWBOYS lose on Saturday.....
Friday, November 7, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
This plant stinks, starfish plant
This plant stinks...smells like rotting meat..the flower..a very funny plant...Friday, October 3, 2008
Political humor
Political Kitty - Cats
A little boy was walking down the street pulling a wagon with a new litter of kittens in it. Al Gore approached him and said "What cute little kittens you have there, young man. What kind are they?" The little boy said, "They're Democrats." Al Gore said, Oh, how nice and moved on.
A week are so later, the little boy is again pulling the kittens down the street. Al Gore and George Bush are walking together and approach the little boy. George Bush said, "Those are some cute kittens. Whatkind are they?"
The little boy said, "They're Republicans."
Al Gore said, "Now, wait just a minute! Last time I saw you with those same kittens, you told me they were Democrats." The little boy smiled and replied, "Yes Sir, but they have their eyes open now."
A little boy was walking down the street pulling a wagon with a new litter of kittens in it. Al Gore approached him and said "What cute little kittens you have there, young man. What kind are they?" The little boy said, "They're Democrats." Al Gore said, Oh, how nice and moved on.
A week are so later, the little boy is again pulling the kittens down the street. Al Gore and George Bush are walking together and approach the little boy. George Bush said, "Those are some cute kittens. Whatkind are they?"
The little boy said, "They're Republicans."
Al Gore said, "Now, wait just a minute! Last time I saw you with those same kittens, you told me they were Democrats." The little boy smiled and replied, "Yes Sir, but they have their eyes open now."
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Funny
There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
He who hesitates is probably right.
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
Did you ever notice: When you put the two words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "THEIRS"?
When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
Don't assume malice for what stupidity can explain.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
He who hesitates is probably right.
If you think there is good in everybody, you haven't met everybody.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.
Did you ever notice: When you put the two words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "THEIRS"?
Monday, September 29, 2008
Interesting comments
"Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia."E.L. Doctorow
My work is being destroyed almost as soon as it is printed. One day it is being read; the next day someone's wrapping fish in it."Al Capp
"Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock."Ben Hecht
"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."Thomas Jefferson
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day just exactly fits in the newspaper."Jerry Seinfield
"The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault."Henry Kissinger
My work is being destroyed almost as soon as it is printed. One day it is being read; the next day someone's wrapping fish in it."Al Capp
"Trying to determine what is going on in the world by reading newspapers is like trying to tell the time by watching the second hand of a clock."Ben Hecht
"The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers."Thomas Jefferson
"It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day just exactly fits in the newspaper."Jerry Seinfield
"The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault."Henry Kissinger
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Humorous Quotes from Tom Robbin
Humorous Quotes from Tom Robbins' Wild Ducks Flying Backward
In downtown Seattle, for some reason, most of the excess buildings are beige. Seattleites complain of beige a vu: the sensation that they’ve seen that color before.
If something is so hazardous and destructive and ugly and spooky that we don’t know what to do with it, we stick it in Nevada.
Much of it is nutty and most of it is crude (the Nevada state song is the exaggerated belch)...
For two blustery days, we holed up in the hotel, chasing fruit around the cylinder of a slot machine.
(Of the Okavango) The water is pure enough to drink, warm enough to bathe in, although if you splash for more than ten minutes, a drooling crocodile will usually show up and demand a wine list.
It knows that it looks as if it were carved out of bubblegum, as if it mutated from a radioactive conch patch, as if it leaked from the vat where old flamingos go to dye – but the Don CeSar (Hotel in Miami) doesn’t care.
In the Selous (in Tanzania), one doesn’t catch a safari bus to the corner of Zebra and Watusi. To see the Selous, one hikes and one paddles. And when an aggravated hippopotamus is charging one’s rubber raft, one paddles very hard, indeed.
Perhaps they (family and friends) sensed that after my recent dealings with editors, agents, lawyers, producers, and reviewers, I might be primed for the company of crocodiles.
From the port city of Dar es Salaam, we have traveled into the interior on a toy railroad: one locomotive, one car, and narrow-gauge track, all three built by the Chinese. It was definitely not a main line. It was a chow mein line.
Our first day in the bush finds us up at dawn. Having only seen dawn from the other side of the clock, I never imagined daybreak might actually be pleasant.
The refreshment we’re served is Rufiji punch: raspberry Kool-Aid made with river water that has been purified via medicine kit. The water is eighty degrees, buzzing with silt, stinking of iodine, and no doubt heavily laced with crocodile drool and hippo pee. We welcome it as if it were French champagne.
Characteristically, hippopotamuses make a noise that is a cross between scales being run on out-of-tune bassoon and the chortling of a mad Roman emperor.
In downtown Seattle, for some reason, most of the excess buildings are beige. Seattleites complain of beige a vu: the sensation that they’ve seen that color before.
If something is so hazardous and destructive and ugly and spooky that we don’t know what to do with it, we stick it in Nevada.
Much of it is nutty and most of it is crude (the Nevada state song is the exaggerated belch)...
For two blustery days, we holed up in the hotel, chasing fruit around the cylinder of a slot machine.
(Of the Okavango) The water is pure enough to drink, warm enough to bathe in, although if you splash for more than ten minutes, a drooling crocodile will usually show up and demand a wine list.
It knows that it looks as if it were carved out of bubblegum, as if it mutated from a radioactive conch patch, as if it leaked from the vat where old flamingos go to dye – but the Don CeSar (Hotel in Miami) doesn’t care.
In the Selous (in Tanzania), one doesn’t catch a safari bus to the corner of Zebra and Watusi. To see the Selous, one hikes and one paddles. And when an aggravated hippopotamus is charging one’s rubber raft, one paddles very hard, indeed.
Perhaps they (family and friends) sensed that after my recent dealings with editors, agents, lawyers, producers, and reviewers, I might be primed for the company of crocodiles.
From the port city of Dar es Salaam, we have traveled into the interior on a toy railroad: one locomotive, one car, and narrow-gauge track, all three built by the Chinese. It was definitely not a main line. It was a chow mein line.
Our first day in the bush finds us up at dawn. Having only seen dawn from the other side of the clock, I never imagined daybreak might actually be pleasant.
The refreshment we’re served is Rufiji punch: raspberry Kool-Aid made with river water that has been purified via medicine kit. The water is eighty degrees, buzzing with silt, stinking of iodine, and no doubt heavily laced with crocodile drool and hippo pee. We welcome it as if it were French champagne.
Characteristically, hippopotamuses make a noise that is a cross between scales being run on out-of-tune bassoon and the chortling of a mad Roman emperor.
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Chicken story
www.ananova.com 9/2008
Cat adopts chicken
A farmhouse cat has adopted a chicken after she became the only survivor of a fox attack.
Tiny chick Gladys was rescued by its owners and brought into the house two and a half months ago.
Snowy the cat took over the job of looking after the traumatised chicken and now the pair are inseparable.
Jane Etheridge, of Middleton, Suffolk, said the unlikely alliance began when one of her bantam hens hatched 14 chicks including Gladys.
But after just two days she found just three of the birds left and a pile of feathers after a fox paid a visit.
Two of the chicks later died but Gladys survived and was brought into the farmhouse in a box to build her strength where she was befriended by 10-year-old Snowy.
Mrs Etheridge, 69, a pony breeder who is married to Albert, 70, said: "Snowy cleaned her and washed her. Gladys is now about two-and-a-half months old and is our pet. She still comes into the house to play.
"She comes in and bounces up and down in front of Snowy and he just stands there and takes it and puts his arm around her.
"They are the best of friends, very much so, and when she first started going out she would not go unless they went together. They are a strange couple but we love them both very much."
Cat adopts chicken
A farmhouse cat has adopted a chicken after she became the only survivor of a fox attack.
Tiny chick Gladys was rescued by its owners and brought into the house two and a half months ago.
Snowy the cat took over the job of looking after the traumatised chicken and now the pair are inseparable.
Jane Etheridge, of Middleton, Suffolk, said the unlikely alliance began when one of her bantam hens hatched 14 chicks including Gladys.
But after just two days she found just three of the birds left and a pile of feathers after a fox paid a visit.
Two of the chicks later died but Gladys survived and was brought into the farmhouse in a box to build her strength where she was befriended by 10-year-old Snowy.
Mrs Etheridge, 69, a pony breeder who is married to Albert, 70, said: "Snowy cleaned her and washed her. Gladys is now about two-and-a-half months old and is our pet. She still comes into the house to play.
"She comes in and bounces up and down in front of Snowy and he just stands there and takes it and puts his arm around her.
"They are the best of friends, very much so, and when she first started going out she would not go unless they went together. They are a strange couple but we love them both very much."
Friday, September 26, 2008
Maxxhits.com
- FREE Search Engine Submission
Click here to submit your URL to over 8000 search engines,
directories and links pages Free. Boost your website's traffic fast!!!
- FREE Search Engine Submission
Click here to submit your URL to over 8000 search engines,
directories and links pages Free. Boost your website's traffic fast!!!
Dog Rules
Ten Dog Rules
1. The dog is not allowed in the house.
2. Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
3. Ok, fine, the dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture.
4. The dog can get on the old furniture only.
5. Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed.
6. Okay, the dog is allowed on the bed, but only by invitation.
7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers.
8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only!
9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night.
10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.
1. The dog is not allowed in the house.
2. Okay, the dog is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms.
3. Ok, fine, the dog is allowed in all rooms, but has to stay off the furniture.
4. The dog can get on the old furniture only.
5. Fine, the dog is allowed on all the furniture, but is not allowed to sleep with the humans on the bed.
6. Okay, the dog is allowed on the bed, but only by invitation.
7. The dog can sleep on the bed whenever he wants, but not under the covers.
8. The dog can sleep under the covers by invitation only!
9. The dog can sleep under the covers every night.
10. Humans must ask permission to sleep under the covers with the dog.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Interesting comments for Thursday
"My doctors told me this morning my blood pressure is down so low that I can start reading the newspapers."Ronald Reagan
"Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton asked why."Bernard Baruch
"In your thirst for knowledge, be sure not to drown in all the information."Anthony J. D'Angelo
"Wooing the press is an exercise roughly akin to picnicking with a tiger. You might enjoy the meal, but the tiger always eats last."Maureen Dowd
"Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton asked why."Bernard Baruch
"In your thirst for knowledge, be sure not to drown in all the information."Anthony J. D'Angelo
"Wooing the press is an exercise roughly akin to picnicking with a tiger. You might enjoy the meal, but the tiger always eats last."Maureen Dowd
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Collection of videos below
I have hand picked some amusing video. I especially like the short animated ones...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
